It's hard to admit it when things don't go as planned, when things don't go the way you think others expect them to go. But let's face it. Life doesn't resemble a Friends episode no matter how much we wish it did. Our families don't look much like the Huxtables. And recently I've come to the conclusion that it's ok.
But somewhere along the way we got it in our heads that this was what others wanted to hear. Progress, success, accomplishment.
Don't get me wrong those are important, too. But what about the messy, imperfect chaotic parts?
I read this post on Huffington tonight. As I reached the end I realized that this was in large part why I never sent out that Christmas letter I planned shortly after we were married (14 years ago). Not because there wasn't joyous, wonderful things to say but because I felt like the ugly needed to be shared with the beautiful and no one wanted to hear about the ugly.
And I ask myself at what point did we decide that our lives were only noteworthy based on the pretty, picture perfect parts?
Recently, I noticed more than one female friend on Facebook remove her married name from her profile in the past few months. I wonder if the ugly parts of that process made it into her Christmas letter. I have another FB friend who lost her husband suddenly - he wasn't even 40. I wonder what her letter would have looked like.
Well, now we find our family in a season with a lot of ugly. Chaos seems to rule the roost. We get glimpses of the beautiful but they seem fleeting, at best. So I ponder what a Christmas letter to friends and family might be like and I wonder whether it is what they "expect".
Little Dude made leaps and bounds in reading.
Big Dude finally learned to tie his shoes.
Kitty got braces on and off in less than 6 months and has a beautiful smile to show for it.
Little Dude drives us to the end of our patience with his endless disobedience.
Big Dude received a co-morbid diagnosis that has added a level of stress to everyone in our home that we could have never imagined humanly possible.
Kitty spent several weeks having extremely intense nightmares.
What parts of this past year are you leaving out of the proverbial Christmas letter because they seem too messy? How can we all share a little more of the messy parts so that the messy starts to become a little bit more loved like the beautiful?
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